However, the moments that you are face-to-face with your doc are precious and not to be spent in silence, hoping that he or she figures out that you haven’t been doing so great or that you would really like to improve functioning in a certain area. In terms of ensuring that you are getting what you need, the appointment is the stage and you are the lead player. It is up to you to effectively let the doctor know what is happening and what you would like to see change.
Multiple sclerosis is unlike many other diseases, such as cancer or cardiac problems, in that there is not really an objective test that can give a snapshot of our condition. Sure, the doc can look at our MRI scans and see what is going on in terms of lesions and disease activity, but this doesn’t correspond so well to our symptoms and disability levels. That information comes from us. We have to tell the doc what is going on with our MS symptoms, otherwise, he simply will not know that we are having problems in certain areas. And if our doc doesn't know, he certainly cannot help us.
I understand that many of us become tongue-tied or overwhelmed in our doctor's presence. I am attaching some articles to help you formulate your thinking around effective communication with your doc – to help you strategize what is important and how to get these points across.
Some of these articles come from the site of my colleague and friend, Trisha Torrey, the About.com Guide to Patient Empowerment. Take a look at her site, patients.about.com, for further ideas on how to get the very best medical care you can.
Communicate with Your Doctor Objectively and Respectfully
Remember, communication is a two-way street. You absolutely need to express yourself, but the doc also needs to listen to you. Then, you need to take your turn being the listener, while your doctor tells you what he or she thinks about your situation and what the next steps might be. Sounds elementary, but many times, one party is busy formulating next thoughts and not really paying attention. Also, there are certain realities about the doctor-patient relationship that cannot be ignored, such as the doc's limited time.
Take a look at this article for some tips on getting the most out of this time with your doc: Effective Patient-Doctor Communications
Give Specific Information about Your Symptoms
Despite all of my cheerleading and advice about how to really communicate effectively with your neurologist, I can remember an appointment where the best answer that I could give to the doctor's "How are you feeling?" was "Yucky." His follow-up question of "What is bothering you?" elicited from me an even less helpful "Everything." Then I put my head down on his desk and wept.
Needless to say, he started out by evaluating me for depression and we never really got to the fact that it was my overwhelming fatigue and the "MS hug" that was the real problem. I left his office with no real solutions that time, because he didn't know what he was trying to treat. On the occasions when I have been specific about my twinges and "malfunctions," I have left with concrete treatment strategies and instructions.
Take a look at this article to give you some ideas about the kinds of details that docs need in order to put together a plan of attack that has a chance of working: Talk About Your Symptoms
Be Prepared for Your Appointment
Many people just show up at the scheduled time for their appointments, expecting everything to "just happen" in that 15 to 30 minutes with their doctor. You can "supercharge" this time and make it extremely efficient by putting a little time and thought into preparing to see your doc.
Get some tips on getting yourself ready for an appointment: How to Prepare for an Appointment with Your MS Neurologist
How to Make Up
There are many reasons why the relationship between you and your doc may have become strained – you may have an outstanding bill, he may have forgotten to share test results with you in a timely manner, you may have stopped adhering to your treatment plan and are embarrassed, she may have laughed when you said you wanted to try an experimental treatment… The list is endless and the fault can lie with either party.
You need to analyze what caused the problem, then decide if you want to keep seeing this doc. Once you have figured out if you want to patch up the relationship, you need to look at what it will take to fix the situation.
This article will tell you what is appropriate and what is not (you should never grovel or beg, for instance), and these tips will give you the best chance of getting back on track with your doc: How to Repair a Relationship with Your Doctor
